The Importance of Learning How to Love

Itd16690400441921886c8611b29676fdcx is a myth of epic proportions that relationships work between the right people and fail between the wrong people. Today parents believe they got a bad egg, when their child does not behave. Men and women believe they married the wrong person, when their marriage is in shambles. We have the same thinking when it comes to our pets, we think we got a bad dog when it barks all the time, or chews the furniture.

In reality, no one drew the short straw. Everyone is in the same boat of needing to learn how to have healthy relationships. No one is going to birth a child that knows how to behave. No one is going to have a healthy marriage without learning how. No barking dog is going to bark less unless it is trained to do so.veruca_salt

If you burn everything you cook on your stove, you don’t buy a new stove to fix the problem, you learn how to cook. No one can cook without learning how. Some will learn from trial and error, some from cook books, some from parents or a friend, and some from You Tube. But no one just knows how to cook.

We did not do something wrong by not having been taught. But once we realize we want to cook and enjoy what we make, it is time to make the effort to learn. The myth that relationships work with the right people will keep us from realizing our problem is not a need for the right people, but the right training.

When we are properly armed with the right tools for healthy relationships, Read more

Aligning Our Thinking

downloadIf we are going to be wrong, let’s be thoughtfully and consistently wrong. If we say we do not believe in rainbows, let us not marvel at how amazing reflective light is when displayed across the sky.

As a worldview revitalizer, I pay close attention to how we think. In doing so, I find that how we think is often in-congruent with how we live.

It is said that to err is human. Therefore, it’s not abnormal for us to be living in contradiction to what is true in multiple areas of our lives. What ought not to be common place is living out of sync with ourselves.

I once had a history professor who declared there was no truth to the degree that history was unknowable and facts unascertainable. Her very life was in contradiction to her belief. To make matters worse, she professed that plagiarism was an absolute moral wrong. She couldn’t fathom why her classroom of students thought plagiarism excusable under many circumstances.

If she wanted to believe that history was unknowable, that is her prerogative, but she ought to have gone all the way with it and found a different manner of employment.

Harmonizing our words and our actions

Today we have people who speak and live contradictions on a weekly if not daily basis. We don’t think before we speak and we say whatever comes in the moment only to contradict ourselves a few minutes later. We are careless with our words. We love things we moderately like or deplore things that we tolerate quite well.

When we do not take the time to be true to ourselves how can we expect others to trust us? Read more